Hey lady, get your own schtick!

With the new hospital rules in place until the H1N1 hysteria has died down (no one under 18 is allowed anywhere near the maternity ward -this excludes the persons being born of course- and aside from the mother and partner only two other people from your party are allowed on the floor at one time -so i can have my parents come see us but they have to leave the floor before Tom & Meegan can come up) all maternity ward tours have been shut off (there is a virtual tour on the hospital's website) but we would like a bit more than a virtual tour...ya know?
So I signed us up for a "hospital orientation" which is like the second best thing to a tour (we'll be at the hospital and we'll be shown where to go when we arrive and have a slide show and such of the maternity ward).
But I digress, when i called the hospital to register for this orientation the nice help desk lady helping me asked for my name to which is said "Nichole spelled with an H and my last name is Clark with the traditional spelling". Help desk lady (here to be known as HDL) says "Hmmm, when's your due date?" which i answer and HDL then says "Hmm that's weird, when is your birthday?" so now im getting a bit weirded out and i answer "4/12/82, i preregistered for my stay already is that what's causing the confusion?" HDL then says "no no not that, um what is your address and your partners name?".
Well im getting a bit agitated so I answer and she says "Ok i found you, what's weird is that there is another Nichole Clark with the same spelling as you giving birth in this same hospital and her due date is in the same week but none of your other info matches so i know that it's not you entered twice".
Freaking weird! So of course all i can think of is how FURIOUS i am at this doppelganger stealing my identity(not in the credit sense but in the "i have your name and due date sense). All Cheyenne can think of is that our babies are going to be switched, so no joke, he's bringing a sharpie with him to the hospital to write "Cheyenne is my daddy" on some part of our baby.